Oh, baby, did you fart? 'Cause you just blew me away! And other badpick up lines..

Apparently I signed up for a dating site last year that I didn't even remember! Maybe I was drunk, or maybe the cats did it for me, because they are tired of me putting "Mr. And Mrs. Sprite Coca-Cola Dr. Pepper Soda Pop S-------" on all the mail.

Upon cleaning my email box, I found so many messages in the spam folder, I just had to check it out. Be sure to borrow these gems if you want to catch a girl's  eye.

Which one is your favorite? Let's take a vote!
 

Online dating duds..

As a single (cat) lady in my early thirties, I've visited many an online dating site. I've read so many profiles that I can tell you that yours probably sucks. 

Here's the gist of it:

1. You hate writing about yourself.

2. Your friend made you join this site.

3. You can't live without sex, food, water, air, and whatever smart phone you have.

4. You love to get out and do things, but you're also a homebody who likes to stay home on Friday nights.

5. What are you doing with your life? Living it (to the fullest).

6. I should message you if: I get it. Or I want to know more.

7. The last book you read? What? You don't really read books. Oh! Wait! How To Make Friends and Influence People.

8. You don't like drama.

9. You aren't very original when you message a girl, see below.